Love is not enough

    1.  Love does not = relationship
    2.  Every relationship requires communication
    3.  Sometimes you are talking to a wounded child, not a mature adult.
    4.  Step to Non-Violent Communication
      • an objective observation,
      • the feeling that is created,
      • an underlying need that is not met, and
      • that makes a doable request which is specific in time and place (in short, an OFNR … Observation, Feeling, Need, Request).
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It goes like this:

    1.  State an observation that is factual (when you … e.g. showed up late, did not keep your promise, etc.);
    2.  Describe the feeling that was created for you— which is called owning your feelings or making an “I statement”—such as (I felt … e.g. irritated);
    3.  Explain the need that was not met (because I have a need for … e.g. respect for my time); and
    4.  Make a doable request that is specific in time and place (would you be willing to … e.g. call me on my cell 15 minutes ahead when you are late next time?). If the answer is no, you can either make another request (would you be willing to … e.g. accept that I won’t wait for you and meet you later at …) or state in the same structure how you feel about her
      saying no.

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